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Faithless Prayers Pt. II

by Amish Rage

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1.
if i could pull you from that frame and be the spark that ignites your flame... you're falling apart. i'm in denial. i miss your smile. won't you come running? it's a beautiful life. no single spies, and no warnings. bridle up your heart. not such a beautiful lie. the sun will rise with the morning. the sun will rise again. if i could raise you from your bed and take back all the ugly things i said, i would pull you from the ledge before you start slipping. is it too late? it's a beautiful life. no single spies, and no warnings. bridle up your heart. not such a beautiful lie. the sun will rise with the morning. but cuts and knives in a mirror that lies when all the tears you've shed have gone and dried. set your funeral robes aside for the night and her spies on battalions. on battalions, on battalions, on battalions... won't you fight this? it's a beautiful life. no single spies, and no warnings. bridle up your heart. not such a beautiful lie. the son will rise with the mourning. your son will rise again. your son will rise again. your son will rise again.
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The Garden 04:26
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oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh

about

it's empty. it's always empty, but my pavlovian mornings drag me back to your bed, where reality wrings me out like a dirty sponge. day after day after day.

you're not coming back. no one does.

i'm left with these pictures of you, treasuring your smiles. the lens has left me with bittersweet riches, life blooming in full out of your gentian eyes. eyes so full of joy. full of promise. taken away. how i long to pull you from that frame and hold you in my arms one more time. 

there are days i start a smile in your reflection, but my lips cave from the corners, my voice catching on something as i choke back the tears.

i know we'll meet again where death can never find us, and my joy will be restored, but for now, the brackish familiar runs down onto my tongue, and i miss you all over again.

so. much.

i will never stop loving you.

but i believe the sun will rise again.

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released May 14, 2021

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Amish Rage Portland, Oregon

Searching for truth in whatever clothes it wears.

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